This article was originally posted on LinkedIn on 12th May 2022.

The pandemic highlighted loneliness, but now lockdowns are over, loneliness hasn’t magically gone away. The nature of remote work - can mean that there is more of tendency for workers to experience loneliness. I believe via vulnerable and authentic leadership we can lead the charge and end the stigma, opening up discussions on loneliness and other mental health related topics.

When I turn on my laptop every morning, I bring my whole self to work, not just one part. We are whole humans that work and being honest with ourselves means we can start to be honest with others. I wrote this earlier:

"I often feel disconnected. Sometimes on the most hectic of days, there are sparse opportunities for real human connection. The quality of connection is lacking. It was more obvious during the pandemic but it is still there now. Sometimes I also feel like I am the only one, the leader, the one with experience, the one in my situation - for a fleeting moment, those thoughts creep in and become a feeling - then I can feel alone and separate; alone in my role, with my responsibility and without understanding. For a few beats of life, I can feel disconnected"

Being honest with myself about that disconnection as a leader, via my journalling practice, makes it more authentic and means I can really connect with the overall topic of loneliness in a more meaningful way. Later, I have laid the foundation to have a more real and valid discussion, perhaps sharing with my team - in a more genuine way.

Loneliness is a complex and serious subject. Catherine Seymour, head of research at the Mental Health Foundation, who are behind Mental Health Awareness Week, describes disconnection; ‘If there’s a disconnect for you, between what you have and what you want, whether that’s in quantity or quality, then loneliness is possible", she goes onto outline the wider topic in great detail.

Research and share proactively - by being vulnerable as a leader and discussing these topics, you give the permission needed to start the conversation amongst your team. Reading and researching topics, finding day-to-day opportunities to discuss feelings and emotions in a casual way (during virtual social coffee chats and 1-2-1s) or using Mental Health Awareness Week as an opportunity to prompt a discussion.

Ensure your virtual door is open - As a leader, ask yourself “How would I ensure my virtual door is open to my team and ways can I demonstrate that regularly”. Remember, you can use honesty and open conversation to end stigma and support your team members, holistically. Try sharing what you are comfortable with openly with your team, to demonstrate your human side and lead by example.

Take an organisational wide approach - Ensure you have a mental health policy in place, within your HR policy and protocols (check out this example from GitLab) and ensure it is nuanced, supported with initiatives and integrated practically into daily conversations and operations. Then move on to look to embed (and reiterate) this with learning and development support for staff and particularly managers who may need guidance on how to ask, listen and support their staff, in a remote world. Also, see the end of this article for further reading on how to integrate Mental Health into organisational policy, with a holistic approach.

A Final Note - Maybe you have had a bad experience of discussing a delicate or sensitive topic previously - that is why we tend to avoid them. But please reconsider: the key is to learn how to handle these situations in a way that enables less discomfort for you, and supports the person you’re talking to.

In the workplace, a difficult conversation is one in which you have to manage emotions (both your own and your team’s) and information in a sensitive way. Whenever a problem arises that may scare or impact your team’s wellbeing, make sure you transparently address it so that your peers and workers can feel safe, in an openly supportive environment. Digest the above, plan, but don’t script: conversations are 2-way interactions where compassion and empathy are the key elements to ensuring healthy communication.

Moreover, the very first step to being a compassionate leader is being self-compassionate, first to yourself and then you will be ready to be supportive to others.

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This article was originally posted on LinkedIn on 12th May 2022.